• When he appears before up with flying mane and flowing tail, divested of bridle, saddle and harness, free of the signs of his subjugation, we sense the open spaces that were once his home and that he ruled with others of his kind

    - Hans- Heinrich Isenbart -
  • The purpose of healing is not to be forever happy; that is impossible. The purpose of healing is to be awake. And to live while you are alive instead of dying while you are alive. Healing is about being broken and whole at the same time.

    - Geneen Roth -
  • The important thing is this:

    To be able, at any moment, to sacrifice what we are for what we could become.

    - Charles Du Bos -

Celebrating Liberation

3rd July 2014

Hello Love,

Here we are – one of my favorite holidays of the year: July 4th. The day we celebrate our freedom, our sovereignty, our independence. By now you might have guessed that I love a good party and celebration of anything, especially when it involves intention, good food, nature, a cocktail or two, and fire (campfires, fireworks, sparklers, etc.).

For this reason, July 4th always brings out the epitome of celebrations for me, and undoubtedly many of you as well.

This year it feels like the energies of freedom and independence have been building, and I’ve noticed a trend in almost every community I circle with – the fierce energy of Kali has been in the air, bringing her promise of liberation to the forefront. In fact, on Solstice I found myself calling this “The Summer of Kali” – and she’s already living up to her name.

I’ve had a long standing love/ hate relationship with the goddess of creation, destruction and liberation for many years now (Check out what I’ve written about her before). This love/ hate relationship goes back to my college days when I channeled her destructive side. I’ll leave out the gory details, but suffice it to say I got into some trouble with her fierceness. And I listened to a hell of a lot of Tool and other metal bands to quench the thirst of that fire.

But then, when I really dove into the ‘spiritual’ side of my life, I kept her to the side – present but hidden – like a forgotten child only coming out to play when I couldn’t deny her presence anymore or when my anger became too much to bear.

Over the past few years, I’ve had a hard time reconciling being peaceful and open-hearted with the fierce fire of the Kali energy.

But last week, in a Priestess Mysterium led by my mentor Elayne Kalila Doughty and based on the 13 Moon Oracle by Ariel Spilsbury, I immersed myself in the totality of this goddess to explore all of her. Not just the scary fierceness I’ve always attached to her. And, I uncovered a layer that shocked and awed me, ironically like fireworks on the 4th of July - the layer of what liberation really means and how incredibly benevolent and loving this fierce goddess actually is. 

Of course, none of this was new to me theoretically – I’ve been studying her since I was 18 after all. But my approach, my vulnerability, the laying down of my shield at the door of her temple made all the difference this time around.

Normally I don’t talk about what happens in these initiations, and I won’t be going into any details of what we did or what happened to me. Rather, I bring this up because for the past month, everywhere I’ve looked and read, her name has been ever present – and so I wondered:

What is the message that Kali is trying to send to all of us right now? Why is she appearing everywhere I look?

And the answer I sense is this:

Kali has been so misunderstood, labeled the destroyer, and a face of the goddess to be feared. Slaying the dragons and cutting off the heads of her opponents, fierce and fiery and drawing her boundaries loud and clear. We talk about the red blood of those she removes from our path, the craziness of her wild nature, her eyes fixed, her mouth screaming, the black soot that cakes her skin.

Her fierce love strikes fear in the hearts of many – especially those of us who have ‘worked’ so hard to open our hearts and bring peace to our lives. I know I have much preferred to hang with Aphrodite. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

But by blocking out the fierce love of the creator destroyer and focusing only on the black and red of her destruction, we are also blocking out an amazing way to channel the white light of love. {Psst- A little known secret: Kali enjoys wearing white and smiling just as much as the rest of those more ‘peaceful’ goddesses. And her laugh is seriously infectious.}

Really, what it comes down to is this:

Kali is also the White Light of Liberation.

Liberation: the act of setting someone free from imprisonment, thoughts or behaviors.

The Liberation of Release.

The Liberation that comes from surrendering in her white loving arms and instead of fighting and fixing and slashing and burning – you rest, release and say “I’m done, even if I don’t know what I’m done with. No more…”

The Liberation that is the doorway and the key to leading The Unbridled Life.

Because here’s the real lesson – by denying any goddess or energy because it doesn’t feel ‘spiritual’ or enlightened, what we are really doing is denying essential pieces keys to our own unfolding and standing firmly as embodied beings in the world.

We can’t have creation without destruction.

We can’t have an open heart without first shattering it to pieces.

We can’t open our eyes fully until we remove the veil that’s in front of them.

We can’t stoke the alchemical fires to create gold unless we first touch the metal and decide it no longer serves us.

And we can’t release the pattern or story without first facing it, acknowledging it, owning it and then saying: ‘No more, I’m done with this. It’s time to be liberated {ahem, unbridled} once and for all”

We talk so much in the coaching and spiritual worlds about healing, intentions, visioning, opening, that we forget that sometimes…

The Ultimate Act of Love & Liberation is not in the fixing, striving, pleasing- but in the letting go, surrendering and at times moving on. {Click to Tweet}

So for this July 4th, I’m declaring a new meaning – rather than raising a glass to Independence Day, I’ll be Celebrating Liberation.  

I invite you to join me.

The steps are simple, if you have the courage to go there:

Step 1: Lay down the fucking shield. Do it. It’s no longer serving you, and we both know it. That shield? It’s what’s standing between you and your liberation. Between your heart and that of your beloved (or future beloved). Between your current reality and your vision. Between you and your destiny.

Step 2: Cut through to the truth of that which no longer serves you, that which when you get really honest with yourself – you are a ‘No’ to at this time. Or at the very least, no longer a ‘Yes’ to. Already know what that is? Great – can you, in The Ultimate Act of Love, be brave enough to let it go?

Don’t know what that is? Most likely, you already do know deep down inside of you what it is, but it may feel really scary to even go there. If this is the case, breathe – a lot. And simply ask the question, over and over again - “What is it that I need to release for my liberation?”

It’s OK if you don’t hear anything, or if what you hear you just can’t do – yet. All that is required here is being willing to simply ask. Kali will take care of the rest.

Step 3: Surrender into her arms. Let it go. Move on.

Step 4: Make the call, have the conversation, break the lease, fire the employee, break up with him, end the contract, decide to move… whatever it is, have the courage to allow the walls to come down in the service of destruction for your liberation.

Step 5: Celebrate your Liberation. Like really celebrate it!! Treat yourself to something oh-so-amazing for your animal body. Throw a party with your friends. Celebrate it on Facebook. However you want to do it, just make sure that you take the time to honor your decisions, have gratitude for the process, and celebrate that no matter how big or small or pleasurable or in-the-moment painful, you took a step closer to your destiny.

On July 4th, I’ll be announcing my own Celebrating Liberation that came from the past several weeks immersed in Kali energy via Facebook, Twitter and Instagram with the hashtag #CelebratingLiberation and I invite all of you to join me in your own way, no matter how big, small, if it’s an internal shift or external moving on… I want to celebrate it ALL with as many of you as I can!

Step 6: Seek support in this process. Go to your tribes, your communities. Share it with your partner or best friends. Open up and be vulnerable about what happened. And if the Liberation you are seeking requires more support, mentoring or deep dives to get to the answers, there are 2 ways I can help:

  1. I opened up 2 spaces in my Embody Program to support you. Although my one-on-one client practice is full right now, my heart is telling me to create the space to mentor 2 more of you in the fiery heat of this Summer of Kali. If you are interested, please respond directly or email emily@theunbridledlife.com to set up a time to speak with me.
  2. I also opened up 5 slots for Open sessions in July, which you can learn more about here.

I can’t wait to see what your own Celebrating Liberation is on Friday, July 4th. Be sure to tag me @jenblackstock and #CelebratingLiberation so I can celebrate with you!

Fearlessly Loving & Unbridled,
Jen Blackstock

YOU are the Guru

20th June 2014

I suspect that the whole point of our spectacularly confounding moment in history is that each of us must become our own savior. And if we hope to accomplish that,…



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